What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and...

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Why can't ugly women date hot guys? I know a woman who wants a hot BF but people would just laugh at her and ask her "what can you bring to the table for him?", isn't that messed up?

Make Nazis afraid again!

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

Have you ever followed through being bi-curious?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Is marijuana bad for you?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Investigative Reporters Sound the Alarm at Peabody Awards - Variety

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Murder, Sexual Assault, And Massive Fraud: 15 Celebrities Who Are In Jail For A Long Time - BuzzFeed

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

TEXT:

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

Trump Crypto Wallet Goes Dark Following Cease and Desist - Decrypt

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Why am I dreaming of people I've never seen before?

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Amid tariff drama, good economic news can't catch a break - Axios

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

Sometime ago, the Iranian Minister said that a US Navy aircraft carrier would be an easy target for 300 speed boats armed with Katyusha rocket launchers. Is this true?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Is love natural, or is it somehow created?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!